11 February 2011

Calm before the Storm

As I write, the house is quiet, but not too quiet.  It’s that just right kind of quiet, you know? It's Friday night and Aiden is already in his jammies, hanging out on the couch with his dad having a pb&j.  I’m in the other room and although the tv is on, all I can seem to hear coming from the living room is the sweet sound of a father and son.  A week has now gone by since the news. Last time I wrote, everything seemed to be falling into place just the way it should, everything was just right. The last week has brought many prayers, tears shed and extra hugs. Such is the life of a military wife as she prepares her family for deployment.  Last time around, it was just the hubs and I and we had months to prepare.  This time, it came short notice and unexpected...along with the fact that the littlest member of the house has no idea whats about to rock his world.  As if in the last two months haven’t brought enough change to our life, we must now endure this.  It's moments like this, on nights like this, that will soon be missed tremendously.  One of the most important things I learned though the last deployment was that trying to find something, anything, no matter how big or small, that is positive really helps to keep me going. It’s so easy to be angry and distant right before a separation but so much more important to truly enjoy the time you have with your loved one.  An unfortunate truth is that it could be the last. And I don’t just say that as an Army wife who sends her husband off to war. I also say it as a mother who gets in a vehicle everyday with her child and a daughter who no longer lives near her parents.  Our time on this earth is not a given, its a blessing. A blessing that can be gone just.like.that.  Hate is easy, love takes courage. Loving my husband and continuously striving to have a successful marriage  is by far one of the most courageous things I have ever attempted! Also at the top of that list is parenthood. I’m thinking that my new motto should be “You can’t scare me, I’m a toddler’s mom and a Soldier’s wife!” As funny as it might be, the truth is I do get scared. But maybe that’s what helps me to keep the faith.  A little at a time, when I seem need it the most my faith grows stronger. Some days will be better than others in the coming months and although there may be a storm in the forecast, today was a good day. A calm day. A blessed day. A happy day. And as the storm approaches, we will continue to take each day one at a time until the storm passes.

Happy moments, praise God.
Difficult moments, seek God.
Quiet moments, worship God.
Painful moments, trust God.
Every moment, Thank God.

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